The best books to help the caregiver plan and care for their charge… or for children and grandchildren.

Love and Forgetting

Love and Forgetting

Julie Macfie Sobol wakes up to a whirlwind of blankets: her husband, Ken Sobol, is tearing the bed apart.

He is throwing the sheets back and forth above her head.

“I can’t get the damn covers right!” he says.

Ken tries a few more combinations—a quilt with a blanket, two blankets, the quilt alone—before he settles on one that works. When he’s satisfied, he falls straight back to sleep.

But Julie stays awake the rest of the night, worrying. She knows this behavior isn’t typical of her husband. She knows something is wrong.  And she’s noticed a few episodes like this lately.

It isn’t until a few months later that Ken is diagnosed with Lewy body dementia.

I can’t get the damn covers right!

After his diagnosis in 2008, the couple, who had been writing partners for years, began documenting their experience in their book, Love and Forgetting: A Husband and Wife’s Journey Through Dementia, which was published in 2013, three years after Ken’s death.

Ken and Julie were married for nearly 50 years. The couple met at the University of Ohio in 1959, and it didn’t take long for them to decide they wanted to spend the rest of their lives together. After school, they began what would turn out to be a long, adventurous marriage. 

The couple moved to New York, where Ken began working for the Village Voice, then later to Los Angeles, where he scripted famous kids shows like The Care Bears. The couple decided to start a family, and had three kids in five years. 

In 1974, they relocated to Canada. They came to visit friends, but were impressed by the country’s health care system, and felt they could picture themselves there permanently.

In Canada, Ken wrote for more kids’ television shows, as well as multiple books, including a Babe Ruth biography. 

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Love and Forgetting: A husband and wife's journey through dementia

This is the story of two courageous people, Julie Macfie Sobol and Ken Sobol, life partners as well as writing partners. Caught up in the fatal fog of Lewy body disease, they started writing this book together. As Ken's disease progresses and his voice dwindles, Julie continues the narration, sharing her sadness, frustration, and attempts to find the best care for her husband. Their chronicling of the ravages wrought by LBD is intelligent, insightful, enlightening, and often humorous. It is at heart a love story.

About the author

Megan Jones

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